...but this is ridiculous.
It's amazing how little things can mess with an anxious head. I came home from work today, plugged my laptop into the socket adapter as usual and BANG... severe bang and severe spark...
Rather than thinking 'oh damn what's happened to my laptop,' I was more concerned with whether I'd actually been electrically shocked, despite feeling nothing, and indeed whether an electrical fire was imminent. Before I'd plucked up courage to do anything, such as unplug appliances, after getting over the initial shock (emotional, not electrical) of the incident, I started deconstructing why I was frightened of this occurrence. Was it health anxiety, and a fear of somehow being electrically charged and having a belated electric shock? Possibly, but I think it was pure and raw negativity.
I was not only thinking of the worst case scenario, much of my thoughts were not even rational or justified. But then it dawned on me - having an anxiety condition is all very irrational. One is anxious about things that really do not need to be anxiety producing.
I'm sitting here now, using the laptop, about 2 hours after the incident occurred. It took me an hour to put everything back to the way it was. I'm still wary... I can feel my left arm, the one that was plugging in the laptop. I am over-noticing feelings in it, if that makes sense. This is nothing unusual given my fear of heart failure of course, but even still. And I keep thinking I can smell smoke.
It just shows how incredible the mind can be... and how irrational anxiety can make things.
Best wishes
Al
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