Anxiety Gave Me One Present...



I've never had a present that looks like this


OK, so it's taken me a month since Christmas to write another blog.  I've been back at work for nearly 3 weeks now, and although it isn't quite at it's intensity workload-wise compared to late last year (see another previous blog), it's still pretty busy.  And I have already done three presentations. 

Public speaking is the bain of many people's lives, of that I am certain.  The number of people who simply dread speaking to an audience, even if they know them, is huge.  Obviously, as with anything*, the more you do it the easier it gets, but for some people it can take a bloody long time. 

Yes, surprise surprise, I am speaking from experience here.  I remember one of the first presentations I did at Uni.  I had no idea what I was talking about.  Mining, if I recall; what that had to do with my degree I don't know, but anyway.  To make things worse, I was put with a guy who was scared of not speaking in public, i.e., he loved the sound of his own voice and, for that matter, loved other people hearing it too.  Pity for him most other people didn't.

Anyway, I digress.  The point is, that put more pressure on me than if I was on my own.  At least alone, I could have screwed it up all by myself and no-one could blame me.  Many people find joint presentations easier than doing them alone, and yes I probably would have, if was with a friend.  Even then, if you screw up you feel bad for them.  Luckily, most presentations I do today are alone and I find that takes the pressure off.

Thing I've learnt about presentations 1: Do them on your own, if possible.

In this example, I also didn't know what I was talking about.  I was shy and timid back then, and most probably going through a period of intense anxiety, so the other guy dominated proceedings and told me what to say, basically.  Despite that, I had no idea come the day and basically read off some notes I'd written down.

Thing I've learnt about presentations 2: Know what you're talking about.

Again luckily, I now only present on stuff I know at least a bit about.  Now, the rest of the things I've learnt, listed below, will come with time and persistence.

Thing I've learnt about presentations 3: Be honest if you don't know something or if someone asks you a question that you don't know.  I appreciate this can be embarrassing, but if you promise to find out for them and almost have a bit of a joke with them that "wow, that was a hard question, are you here to test me?" then generally they react quite well.  They are only human after all.

Thing I've learnt about presentations 4: Most of your audience will have been in the same position.  Picture each one of them, particularly if you know one of them to be (over)confident, feeling the same things as you.  They will have once upon a time.  Some people do have the 'knack,' like art or music, but presenting does improve with practise.

Now, this is all very well (I hear you cry), but what if you have chronic anxiety and are going through a particularly bad period?  I had to do a presentation in front of a 50-strong audience (the biggest I've ever done I think) when I was still recovering from my March 25th panic hell in Cornwall.  It was probably the worst experience of my life, behind the aforementioned Cornwall day.  I tried to apply breathing, mindfulness, rationalisation, even alcohol (OK, not alcohol**), but it didn't really help.  Somehow, I managed to do the presentation (luckily it was only 10 minutes) but then spent a good couple of days recovering from the trauma.  So what's the remedy to this?  I'm afraid I don't really have one. 

That said, overall, anxiety has helped with my presentations.  Why?  Two reasons:

1) That event I mentioned above has set a benchmark, i.e., it can't be much worse than that so I don't have to worry too much!  But more importantly...

2) As people reading this will be able to relate to, anxiety has caused me so much pain and distress over the years that now, I laugh in the face of the fear that presentations throw at me.  This has kind of just happened.  Yes, doing plenty of presentations for my job has helped, but the amount of rubbish that anxiety has thrown my way has given me a kind of 'so what' attitude.  Whether this is normal or not I don't know, but today I can even enjoy presentations, especially if I'm passionate about the subject, I'm in front of a responsive audience and I apply the things I've learnt as outlined above.

Don't be afraid of public speaking.  Be proud of who you are and what you say.  I don't always do this, but if you believe it, you might even end up enjoying them.

Best wishes
Al

*Well, most things. Maybe not everything...
**Seriously - I do not condone alcohol as an anxiety remedy!